“There are no events or conferences of interest for tomorrow, December 30.”

This bulletin, put out 30 minutes before Wednesday’s closing bell by the good folks at the Briefing.com news service, has represented the theme of the week for investors: Nothing is going to happen, close out your trading software, turn off your computers, and enjoy your family.

Stocks on Wednesday continued their achingly slow meandering — and even had the poor taste to stage a mild late selloff to spoil what squinting observers could’ve almost called a rally.

Despite the hurrahs of hitting a two-year intraday high, the Dow Jones Industrial Average finished with a paltry 10-point gain to finish at 11,585, while the Nasdaq and S&P 500 followed suit, with slight gains that kept the market’s bullish momentum alive, if barely.

As has been mostly the case since stocks went into a lockdown more than two weeks ago — the S&P 500 has traded within just a 2.4% range since Dec. 13 — most of what has been working has continued to work, and vice-versa.

Gold and silver finished higher, with silver prices within a penny of their 30-year high. The incredible 2010 performance of the iShares Silver Trust (NYSE:SLV) exchange-traded fund continued — up 1.2% for the day, and an eye-popping 70% since Aug. 20.

But metals of the rare earth metals had an even better day, following news that China planned to cap exports of such materials. The Market Vectors Rare Earth/Strategic Metals (NYSE:REMX)  ETF jumped more than 7% on Wednesday.

Oil prices slipped, and volatility bulls saw the five-month trend downward in the fear index remain intact.

Bond bulls were among the day’s biggest winners, with yields on the 10-year note pushed back down to 3.34%, which possibly brings into play the channeled uptrend since early November for technically inclined traders.

With volume again at roughly half the normal levels, contrarian investors in most asset classes will be hard-pressed to look like geniuses this week.